Imagine two worlds, one in which you are able to have twenty-four hour a day access to your loved ones--all through technology...text, Skype, phone. In another world, you only have access to your loved ones for a few hours a day, but the interaction is entirely face to face.
Think this week about which world you would prefer to inhabit.
If you prefer to avoid the simple dichotomy of the question, answer me this: how are relationships different when they are face to face versus technological? What are the implications of so much new technology on humanity and human interaction?
I think I would prefer to inhabit the world where I am able to interact face to face with my loved ones, even if it is only for a few hours a day. I would choose this type of interaction for several reasons. First of all, were all are used to this type of interaction due to the style of lives we have. Because of work, school, and other distractions, we tend to have less interaction with our loved ones. Even if we interact with our loved ones for a short amount of time, that time is enough to fill us with joy and happiness. I think that if we were only able to interact with people through technology eventually we will have the necessity to enjoy the company of those people. It is not the same the feeling you get when you have someone next to you, than the feeling you get when see them through screens or monitors. I know this feeling well because I have not been with my brother and sister in six years. Even though we have had interaction by telephone, text and skype, is not the same as been physically present with them. To be able to be with a loved one for even less than an hour, that would be enough for me to be happy. People say that an image is worth a thousand words but I say the presence of someone next to you is worth more than an image or one thousand words.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you one hundred percent! Face to face interaction is the way to go. Interacting through technology will never be the same, no matter how crazy technology gets. Loved ones are important and deserves face to face and physical interaction. I have a similar situation with your siblings. My uncle is in the Navy and I rarely get to see him, but when I do, it bets all of our "miss you" skypes and texts. It is hard interacting through technology all the time and not physically getting to see your loved ones.
DeleteI agree with you Rodrigo. I am used to only spending a few hours a day with friends, family, and other loved ones because of school and work. I believe we lose that personal connection with others due to technology. Sure we can text, email, and Skype but there isn't the same level of interaction as you get with face-to-face.
DeleteFace to Face is the way to go. My 10 month old daughter already knows what skype is. When Im on the ipad for any reason, she gets excited because she thinks daddy is on there. I hate that she already has that type of experience at such as young age. She cant hug or kiss her daddy via skype! :(
DeleteI didn't think about how much time we interact with people throughout screens until I read that. As I'm on here I admit I was on my phone socializing through social networking sites! I do agree that face to face interaction is a lot more "meaningful" than Skype and all that!
DeleteI would definitely prefer to inhabit the world where I can interact face to face with my loved ones. Even though the interaction is only a few hours a day, it means so much more. There are many, MANY, different reasons why I would choose this type of interactions. The first, touch. You cannot hug, kiss, of feel other through technology. My dad is a fireman and I only see him every other day, and sometimes less. When he gets home in the morning, a hug from him means so much to me. Talking to him through text or Skype doesn't compare to his hug; it makes my mornings. The second reason is the power of words. I understand a text or Skype we can see and hear words, but hearing and seeing someone say something such as "I love you," is a special feeling. My boyfriend and me have been together for 5 years now. Five years down the road, him telling me he loves me in person doesn't compare to "I love you" over text. Also, the way words are said (tone, sound), changes the meaning. Over a text, words can become harder to read the meaning of whats being said.
ReplyDeleteIf we lived in a world with interaction only through technology, we would loose meaning of others. There is nothing better then the feeling of someone you love and care about. We live busy and crazy lives, therefore we only see our loved ones a few hours a day. We are lucky if we get more then a few hours. My loved ones mean more then anything in the world. Technology is a way to stay connected when our busy lives keep us from our loved ones, but it is the only or right way to interact. Face to face interaction will always be top on my list for any situation!
Miranda,
DeleteI liked how you described all the little details that come with interacting with your loved ones face to face. I completely agree when you said "we would loose the meaning of others". Nothing really means the same unless you can actually show it and express it to someone. It is nice to see and feel people reactions to something they are happy or excited about. You can not get that same interaction through a computer. When you interact with someone face to face you know whether that person is really listening to you. You connect with people through these types of interactions and it is important that we continue having these contacts. It is way for us to share our emotions with one another, so that we build bonds.
I totally understand what you mean by that last paragraph, but there is something to be said about interaction via technology. For instance, the thousands of solders that only get to see their kids via skype. I dont think that because of their circumstance, they loose anything in their relationship. But yes, 110%, face to face is better!
DeleteAbigail, yes! Connecting with people is so much easier face to face. It has so much for meaning for me. Although technology lets us keep good contact with our loved ones when we have to be away.
DeleteLike you said Mishabc, I didn't write about my thoughts on technology because I believe face to face is better and I enjoy it so much more, but you are completely right. My uncle is in the Navy and technology gives me the chance to keep in contact with him. Face to face will always be better, but sometimes its impossible. Technology gives my uncle a way to keep in contact with his wife and 5 year old daughter. I don't know what he would do without Skype.
You are so right! It is hard when your loved ones have to be away. I think that technology helps us to stay connected but at the same time is not enough to sustain a relationship indefinitely.
DeleteWorking as telecommunication engineer and dealing with telecommunication infrastructures for about 15 years, technology was not able to convince me that it could replace the traditional face-to-face communication. Every time I was dealing with communication cut off – due to lightning, cable cut, power down – I would appreciate the face-to-face communication more and more. I starred at the broken cable, at the messy telephone wiring closet that caused the cut off, at the burnt power supply, or at the router which failed to send the data packet to the next network to establish a communication link…. I would ask myself… Why is it so complicated to communicate? How could we rely on those stuff to send our smile to the love ones? How could we let those equipment chopped the words that we were saying? How could we use this equipment cut off as the reason for not being able to communicate with our love ones?
ReplyDeleteI am the one who will reply a text message with a call and will response a voice mail message by visiting the caller (if it is doable). When it comes to a face-to-face communication, I am a believer in it. To communicate, I need a body language, eye contact, real smile, real hug, real expressions of sadness or happiness….and all the signs that cannot be sent via the cable. Human needs personal touch. A communication will be more meaningful when it is personalized with human touch. This is what makes a face to face communication cannot be replaced with technology. Even though fiber optic cable can transmit information with the speed of light, but it cannot transmit the signs from your parents’ eyes that say they are fine; the message that can comfort you immediately.
What are the implications of so much new technology on humanity and human interaction? For a long distance relationship such as what I have now with my dad in Indonesia or with my sister in the Middle East – technology is a bridge. It enables us to communicate regardless how far we are to each other. In this case, technology is used conveniently to help us stay in touch. However, technology should not replace a-face-to-face interaction. Human touch should control the way we use technology. Technology without human touch, it will create a barrier. The barrier is getting thicker and thicker when the technology controls how people interact to each other. If it controls us, the communication is no more than sending information from one machine to another machine – emotionless, humanless.
I agree with your opinion. Nothing compares to interaction face to face. But I believe is not all about the physical contact and touch. I think the sole presence of a love one being close to you is what makes face to face interaction the best way of interaction. sometimes is not necessary to say a single word or to show any gestures to be able to feel safe and happy when being with someone special. for all the reasons you said, face to face interaction is the best way of interaction.
DeleteHi Arina, technology is better than no technology right? It shouldn't replace face-to-face interaction, but I don't know what I would do without FaceTime.
DeleteWhy don't your dad and sister move here to Bakersfield with you? You seem to miss them. You always mention them in your blogs.
Wow 15 years in telecommunication! That is a lot of experience with technology. I like how you said that people are not able to send a smile. We are able to send the ":)" and type "lol or "hahaha", but it is not the same as an actual smile or laugh that could be shared face-to-face. Granted, you are able to communicate much easier with those who live far away, but face-to-face interactions are always preferred and I am sure everyone believes that.
DeleteThanks, Rodrigo!
DeleteSarah, yes, you're right! Technology is better than no technology. I still remembered when I worked in Germany, it took one month for my mom to receive a letter from me. Right now, we just need less than a second.
However, sometimes we overuse technology until we get lost and do not know what we are supposed to do.
Yes Sarah, I miss my dad and my sister! My sister is in Doha, Qatar and my brother is in Borneo, Indonesia. All my dad's kids are so far away from him. And everything is not the same anymore since my mom passed away a couple years ago. He is alone now. :(
Britanny..yes, 15 years. I am old ! I am generation X . :)
DeleteHave you ever had experience, sending a text or email or leaving a comment in your friend's Facebook and you forgot putting :) or ;) or :D. And people thought you were mad? It is funny, isnt' it?..how technology has set or digitized our thought.
I would personally like the face to face interaction with my loved ones. For me, it is less personal when you interact with someone through a computer, especially if it is a loved one. When you interact with someone in person you have an emotional connection. You can create bonds through face to face contact because you can actually sense what the other person is feeling. Through one on one interaction we can express ourselves more and develop deeper relationships.
ReplyDeleteTechnology has its good qualities and its bad. It has made life easier and more complicated for all us. Technology has made it easier to communicate and improved the way we get things done. Technology makes building and creating new ideas more efficient. For people half way across the world, they can communicate through Skype with family and friends. It has made our life simpler. Technology has also made it to where we interact less with people. We do not have the same social interactions we once did because everything is done through a smart phone. Most of the time you are walking around a mall or even at school, and all you see is people staring out their phones. I get that we can find out all the latest things because of the internet, but a line has to be drawn somewhere. People need to enjoy and live their life rather than posting about it so that everyone knows about it.
Abigail, people need to stop worrying about capturing a moment and live in the moment, right!?
DeleteI agree with you (Abigail) and Sarah, we need to live in the moment!!! Stop worrying so much about capturing it.
DeleteAnd I also believe that it makes us interact less with others, and that is not good at all!
Miranda, I've always thought if a person has the time to take a picture to show how much fun he/she is having, it really translates that the person is not having fun at all.
DeleteYou are right Miranda and Sarah! People sometimes post about all the fun they are having just so they can make their life more interesting for other people, but for what? The only person that is going to enjoy your life is you! If you are worried about what everyone else is thinking about your life, you will never truly live. We should worry about the relationships we are building with people instead because with all the technology we have the less face to face interaction we have.
DeleteDating is intricate in the aspect that every little move, whether it is physically, mentally, or honest contemplation, can ruin the outcome of a date. Each event that occurs during the dating stage can feel make-or-break to a guy. In all harsh reality, females are the ones who choose which guy stays and which candidate gets eliminated. So the question of how different is courting when it’s implemented in person or from a distance is that they are two entirely different worlds; however, one method is not better than the other. Online gives a person an upperhand in mate selection whereas in-person provides a person with the ability to be able to form an estimation on the other person they are meeting. Both could equally hinder the pursuit of a relationship.
ReplyDeleteOnline profiles are primed with careful selection of what the person wants to share, what info he or she wants to suppress, and how he or she wants to be perceived. The summary online daters build is really a representation of how they themselves perceive their own self. Everything will be exaggerated. Online sort of persuades a person that they have automatic bragging rights. This is because a person online will do whatever it takes to woo whoever’s online and seem endearing. This type of control is unhealthy and can be used a form of trickery.
The abundance of new technology has taken away from the traditional way people meet. It’s affected the process people go through to find a potential mate. The feeling of being destined to that one certain person is robbed because now we can choose and deny people online. We have the power to select mates. Yes, technology has robbed current singles of that rite of passage, but at the same time, they gain a whole scope of selection. They can browse people from the neighboring country if they desired. This is an opportunity that wouldn’t be achievable without technology. I guess it can be said that in order to gain some, we have to lose something. We lost tradition and gained efficiency.
You make great points about the ups and downs of online comunication and how it affect us in mate selection. I liked the part where you said that at the end everything is exaggerated. People do a lot of things to get attention and the online profiles are a great example of this. The fact that you befriend someone online is terrifying because you do not not anything about that person besides their photo and part of their profile, which could be entirely false.
DeleteI think you are spot on when you highlight that both online and "real world" dating both have their positives and negatives and can both compromise the dating situation. It would be interesting to see which of these two has become the most successful avenue for dating. Also, I would be interested in hearing my on your thoughts about the woman being the one who determines who stays and who goes. Are you saying that males do not have any say in who they date and who they choose as a mate? Why is it ultimately the woman's choice?
DeleteRodrigo, it is scary to welcome friends online. You never know their intentions. I'm not saying everyone who has an online profile is a sketchy person, but just go with your gut. If the profile doesn't seem legit, don't add it.
DeleteJacob, I did not mean to sound sexist. What I meant is it is usually the case that men are the seekers. Men usually are more prone to message the female of interest, now multiply that by 5. This female now has 5 males in her inbox. The reason I said women have more control over dating is because she chooses who she wants to message back and who to ignore. It's cruel, but it's the solid truth coming from a female perspective. Maybe I'm wrong? I wouldn't have an idea. I'm just basing this scenario off of my morals and the morals of my girl friends. It would be rare if a woman approached a male online. And I know right. I wonder which approach in dating is most effective.
Technology today is so widespread that it is possible to get cell phone reception almost anywhere. We are able to see people through Skype or video chat on our phones who are on the other side of the planet. It is incredible how far technology has come in such a short amount of time. However, it is no comparison to face-to-face interactions. I am so swamped with work, school, and homework that I only see my loved ones during breakfast and dinner. These few hours are more important to me than any text or phone call I will ever get. I prefer face-to-face interactions when it comes to relationships as well. I was in a long-distance relationship and it was very difficult to be a part of. We would Skype every other night, text constantly, and I was able to visit him, or him visit me, almost every other weekend. Our relationship lasted a little over a year but we could not make it any longer apart. He had cheated on me, probably several times, and I didn't even know until it was too late. I may have been able to sense something was wrong with us if we had spent more time face-to-face and have ended the relationship before the betrayal. I am now in another relationship and we have been together over two years. I see him almost every day for at least a couple of hours and I wouldn't trade those few hours for any amount of time over the phone or computer. I am blessed for the amount of time I am given with my loved ones but it makes it easier since I live near them. It is much more difficult for those who live out of state or even out of the country. I can see why technology has progressed to the level it has so people may get the next best thing other than face-to-face.
ReplyDeleteHi Brittany, so sorry to hear about your ex, but i agree with you. Face to face interactions are very important for reasons like yours. we can sense when someone is lying to us, and we can sometime tell when their behavior have changed.
DeleteThis is so true! I'm also sorry to hear about your ex but I sure am glad you found someone who you can spend time with and trust! I know what you mean about that face to face interactions when it comes to relationships! I was dating a guy a few years back who was in the Marines and stationed overseas in Japan. We Skyped, emailed, messaged, called and even wrote me letters. He ultimately came back home and surprised me on my graduation day and it was way better than all those calls and messages! He was here back on leave for a month and it was the best!
DeleteI am going to go ahead and jump on the face to face band wagon. Only reason being is for obvious ones. Touch. I read about a story where they deprived chimps of touch and after awhile they became incredably depressed and showed signs of psychosis. So, without touch, we can literally go crazy!
ReplyDeleteHowever, there is something to say about technology. My husband was deployed for the second time and before his deployment, things werent so great between us. We were never able to talk things through in person. Emotions ran high and it was easy to just walk away or put it off because they'd still be there later that night. Via Skype however, or even over the normal telephone, we were able to say things and express feelings we were never able to do in person. Neither of us know why this is. We even argue better via text, but thats because you can read and reread what was said to you, and take some time to let it sink in and give your best response. You can ask the person your arguing with to repeat their rant over and over again and then stand their staring at them for several minutes while you think of a response. (lol Im totally picturing it lol)
During our many talks via technology while he was deployed, for a year and a half, we found our problem and we figured out a way to start the healing process and fix what was broke. Something we were unable to do while in person.
The face to face after that was awesome though ;-)
As for the worlds described... dont most of us already live in the world with only a few hours of face to face time? My Husband goes to work and my kids (as well as myself) go to school in the morning and we are all back together again in the late afternoon/evening until bed. During this time apart, we only communicate via technology. Face to face time is 3-5 hours a day (wow!). But those 3-5 hours... priceless
The argument you state about the effects of isolation should really be taken in consideration. Imagine not to be able to feel anything. Without any doubt that would make anyone crazy. Little by little our ways of life, anlong with technology are pulling us apart from the people we love and appreciate. We should realize that is more important to be close to someone for a short period of time than to be with that person, via technology, all the time. Like you said, they might be only a few hours a day, but they are priceless.
DeleteI can totally understand where you are coming from, the usual 3-5 hours a day with my family is what I look forward to everyday. Weekends are so horrendously filled with activities that I actually look forward to Mondays. However, when my husband was off-shore for work and face-to-face was not possible I relied on technology to share everything he missed. I would choose having someone physically in front of me to talk to but, when that's not possible technology is the way to go.
DeleteI have to agree with you on the fact that technology seems to give us a new sense of communication that might not have been available to us without it. I too have been able to use phones or messages to convey messages to others that I simply couldn't have while I was speaking to them face to face and it helps with the process. On the other side, it is sometimes hard for me to do that, because I fear that the person receiving my message, might misunderstand or misinterpret the meaning of the message. This is one of the reasons I really hate having to send emails when I could simply give someone a call and have the assistance of tone for my message.
DeleteGreat point!
I had some friends who were not able to discuss or to talk their relationship problems with their husbands/boy friends/parents through face to face communications. It always ended up in a worse argument or they changed their mind - decided not to discuss about the problems. That was years ago before technology was as advanced as today. So what they finally did was writing a letter to their husbands/boy friends/parents, wrote everything that was hard to say in person. Writing a letter had helped them to communicate better. You're right, if we write what we want to say, we have time to think. Now, as technology is getting more advanced. There are more new ways to communicate and we have more options to choose the most comfortable way (for us) to communicate.
DeleteThanks for sharing!
Your opening statement was mind blowing and sad! Poor monkeys! I totally understand on the whole arguing through messages and all that! My "significant other" and I argue all the time! I think that's how we communicate though. I prefer to "argue" through texting and messaging because i can think about what I want to say and word it how I would want to. The best thing about it is that I can easily take back what I say!
DeleteMy wife and I are the same way. When we get into arguments we do not talk to each other. Then later one of us will send a sad emoji thus indicating we should help work on the problem. So far this method has worked.
DeleteThat emoji idea seems like something worth trying out...
DeleteAs a Sociology student I am extremely interested in the aspects of socialization within our ever changing society. I am especially interested in socializing organically versus inorganically, which in layman’s terms means socialization in-person versus via technology. I can appreciate the ease and availability the world-wide web provides yet, at the same time I am aware of the basic socialization skills that are being lost. The belief that as long as the person you portray on-line is an image worthy of praise or importance, you don’t have to be the same person in the reality. Simple things such as manners and etiquette are taking a back seat to “selfies”.
ReplyDeleteGiven the option of having 24/7 access to my loved ones versus having only a few precious hours of in-person contact I would choose in-person every time. A smile can be universally enjoyed through all means but, a hug or simple touch can mean so much more. This is not to take away the significance of hearing spontaneous laughter that can reach your heart over an internet feed yet, couple that joy with a caress or touch and it can be far more memorable. On a different level I would not want all of my loved ones to have 24/7 access to me via technological outlets as that is kind of overwhelming. I cherish my “me” time, private moments, and quiet time for reflection or just simply for peace of mind. As a parent, full-time student, and wife it is the norm to have only a few hours a day to spend with my family and I would never willingly give that up. Time is precious and tomorrow is never promised.
Beautiful response Moria. I agree that a hug or a simple touch can mean even more than smiles and laughter over an online screen. There are times when I need a hug to help me get through my day. Sounds weird, I know. What do you mean by manners and etiquette are taking a back seat to selfies?
DeleteAny relationship is different face to face or via technology. Technological relationships let it be with a significant other or with family members is so different than face to face because a technology relationship the person can't have any physical feeling of the other such as a hug or a kiss because it is all via technology. Also like if a person is trying to tell you something very important via text and the other person takes minutes or hours to respond back the excitement has diminished or possibly is all gone. In my opinion relationship face to face are the best because you get to spend quality time with your love ones and don't need to wait for a response if you are going to tell them something important or just talk about your day. They are right there in front of you! So much technology has its "ups" and "downs". Technology has allowed us to interact with family members who live in another country and connect with them. I have this friend who was dating this guy and for some reason my other friend got a very bad vibe from him so she decided to search his criminal record, and sure enough he turned out to be a bad guy with an extensive record. Needless to say that relationship did not last. I think if my friend had not search his criminal record she would not know what type of guy he was. I also think that so much technology has also hurt the human interaction. I know plenty of people who are "friends" on face book but are complete strangers and no I am not talking about the 200 plus "friends" they have. But people in the same city who have full blown conversations on social media but once they meet by coincidence they nothing to say maybe a "hi" and "bye". Also people who depend a lot on dating sites, and only people on those sites, why not go out and have human interaction?
ReplyDeleteI agree with you. When you put it in that perspective, i understand where your coming from. And you're right. technology allows us to interact with our family members who are not with us.
DeleteHi Adriana,
DeleteYou made some good points on how technology in some ways is hurting human interaction. We all know technology has its conveniences but in the long run the best human interaction is face to face. I don't like the idea of not being able to be physical with loved ones and creating new memories. For example, I love giving hugs, sometimes all someone needs is a hug for them to feel better and that cannot be accomplished through the web. Technology can get a little sketchy sometimes with online dating. So, I completely agree that human interaction face to face is the best option!
I am in total agreement with you! Technology has definite advantages but, rely on it entirely and you can lose touch with others. With all things moderation is key, too much of one or the other can be overwhelming but, to each his own.
DeleteTechnology has hurt human interaction. I do not believe that people who have 200 or more friends, actually interact with all those people. The word friend itself means something more than just knowing the name of a person. Friends are people who know you very well and have face to face to face interactions with you. People need to start interacting with people in person like they once did. It wasn't hard to do then, so why do we choose not to now?
DeleteI think I would go with the world where I can see my loved ones for a few hours a day, but the interaction is completely face to face. I believe relationships are entirely different when they are face to face versus technological. Some people might think there isn’t a difference between face to face interactions vs. technology but there is. With technological devices, we can hear a person; we can see a person, just like face to face interactions, so what’s the big deal?
ReplyDeleteHumans need physical contact with each other. Infants sink into depression and die without it. How parents interact physically with them becomes a cornerstone of their identity and well-being. Adults deprived of tactile contact for long periods will tell you just how depriving it feels. In day-to-day relationships, never underestimate the power of a handshake, a pat on the back, a hug, or a kiss. On this level of human relating, this is where technology falls short. In the physical, tactile, spatial world we also can do things with people. We can play tennis, go for a walk, and eat dinner together. Doing things with people creates bonds. It creates a history to the relationship. Technological devices cannot provide such human bond. Even the scent of perfume, hair, clothes, skin, these smells brings us very close to the other. It can really stirs up powerful emotional reactions. The sense of taste brings us closer still. It's the sensation of lovers. One might say that smell and taste are rather primitive interpersonal sensations, but both are the cornerstones of deep intimacy maybe because they are so primitive, so fundamental. In addition to touch, smell and taste are the primary ways an infant connects to its mother. It is one's very first, essential relationship that serves as the prototype for all later relationships in one's life.
Geraldine, your take on family and relationships is exactly how I feel! I really value the time that I get to spend with with the people that I really care about! There is nothing more comforting than a hug or a face to face conversation when you are feeling down!
Delete"One might say that smell and taste are rather primitive interpersonal sensations, but both are the cornerstones of deep intimacy maybe because they are so primitive, so fundamental."
DeleteI love this part, Geraldine! You're right! What I miss a lot from my son when he is away is his not-so-good smell when he is sweaty. :)
Geraldine, your right on the money.
DeleteI would prefer to live in the world where I would only have access to my loved ones for a few hours but with an entirely face to face interaction. I feel like in person you can make so many memories with your loved ones that technology cannot give you. I would be able to hug and show affection to my family that could be so much simpler than trying to type out a long Facebook message explaining how much I love them. I hardly ever get to spend time with my family face to face because we live in different cities/states, I don’t drive and I am usually too busy to travel and visit with them. I would appreciate the moments I spend with my loved ones much more knowing that I only have a few moments to spend with them per day. I love to see people’s reaction to things because I just enjoy looking at the different expressions of people. But it is harder to experience this with technology because technology takes away from physically interacting with people. I believe it is messing up our social skills and making humanity dumber in some ways. I notice that little kids don’t play outside as much anymore. They just sit in the house and play video games, on their iPads and tablets, and anything else technology related. It’s sad. Social gatherings are even evolving into something different than what they used to be. I’ve been in many situations where everyone is glued to their phones instead of interacting with those around them. It’s almost like technology is becoming an addiction! We can’t go a day without it! I’m on the computer a lot because I have 3 online courses, I’m constantly using the computer at work and to access everyday things I need to use my laptop or my cellphone. As a result to this I sometimes don’t know how to act or know what to physically do with myself (stand, make eye contact, look around, etc.). That may sound weird but when I am on the computer or on my phone I usually have the same blank expression on my face and I am usually hunched over my computer or I have my neck bent down towards my phone (it occasionally hurts too!). lately I have noticed the subtle changes in my behavior with people during face to face interaction and I wonder how much of this change is caused by technology.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteYou're exactly right Nandi! Our social skills are disappearing because we rarely use them and even when we do, we do not know how. People are losing that personal and social interaction with one another with all this technology. We also should notice a change in ourselves because I am sure the technology has affected the way we behave.
ReplyDeleteAbigail- If any, what changes have you noticed in yourself that may be due to the use of technology? And do you think that there are ways for us to maintain our personal and social skills while still living a technological lifestyle?
DeleteI think have become dependent on technology overall. I feel like I am attached to my phone just because it is how I communicate with friends and family. I wish it was not like that, but I get everything through the devices I use. I do believe there are ways to maintain your social skills. First you can always shut your phone off or leave at home when you go out. I think not having it with you will let you keep your focus on whatever you may be doing. Instead of reading about what other people are doing, you can actually enjoy something yourself. I personally hate when you go out with friends or even family and they start looking at their phone. It is rude because to me it says that you would rather stare at your phone than have a conversation with me. Second, I would just limit yourself to how much you use technology in general. I mean if you have to use it for a class, by all means go ahead and use it. If you just want to be on the computer for no reason, then try to do something more productive. These are my personal thoughts on the matter, so you do not have to agree or even take my suggestions, but thank you for asking those good questions.
DeleteGreat response Abigail! I never intentionally leave my phone at home when I go out, but sometimes I accidentally leave it behind. When this happens I find myself constantly worrying about my phone, "Is someone calling me?", "I'm sure everyone is trying to reach me", "I bet I have a ton of messages!" I literally feel lost without my phone and I know that is so terrible! I don't like when I am with friends or family to hangout and they are constantly on their phones either. Unfortunately, my feelings towards that are very hypercritical because I tend to do the same thing to other people.
DeletePersonally, I would like to be able to say that I need the face to face communication world option to be able to function, but part of me thinks this may not be true. I come from a fairly large family, I am 5th of 6 kids, and it would be hard to go a day without talking to any of them. I would say that I communicate with at least 4 members of my immediate family on a daily to weekly basis, so it would be hard to cut ties with them throughout the day--which is made possible by technology-- just so I could see them face to face for a small amount of time. Also, because our family is so large, get togethers and gatherings tend to be loud and chaotic, but also really fun!
ReplyDeleteHowever, being newly engaged and weeks away from getting married, I don't think I could ever opt in for the world where face to face communication with my fiancee was cut. The time and effort that have and continue to put into our relationship would all be for not, if we weren't able to enjoy each other's company and enjoy quality time together. Having this face to face interaction allows us to built our relationship and understand each other better which leads to better overall communication and a much healthier relationship.
When you think about it, how many times have you been wrong when interpreting someone's email or text? You lose all tone and bodily language which allows us as humans to read and interpret others in order to communicate effectively. If we were to cut all possibilities of face to face interactions, I think that we would have to fill that gap by improving current technology, such as video conferencing and other tools similar to things like Skype and FaceTime, in order to have any hope of keeping our personal and social skills sharp.
It's a hard answer to give, but if the technology was in place and I was able to be more in touch with my family, I might choose the world with unlimited access via technology. However, if I have it my way, I would live in a world that blended the two--as we are--but placed a higher emphasis on the face to face interaction.
To avoid misinterpreations via text.... insert a little smiley or mad face to show what emotion youre trying to get across. lol j/k
DeleteI have been down that road where texts/emails get taken wrong and theres really no way around it. Even with a smiley included, the other person could still take it wrong and think youre mocking them on top of it. What if we lived in star wars times and we were able to produce hollagrams from our phones so we get the 3d image of the other person. We'd get their voice and their body language.
You made a great point when mentioning that texts and emails can be easily misinterpreted. One of the best things about speaking to people in person is being able to communicate through body language.
DeleteThe connection you made with this topic and your relationship is great. Relationships could not be the same nor could they go as far through only interacting through the internet. It is the face to face interaction, i believe, that makes us human.
So true over texting and emailing it is hard to know if someone is upset or not! But I would rather have it than not!
ReplyDeleteI think that the two worlds provide a little of both ideals depending on the friend or family member you are talking about. Some of the people that you care about you can only take in small doses, others you feel like you can always be together. In my life I very much like to be around people but at the same time I also like to be alone at times too. I think that I would enjoy the world where you get to see your loved ones for a few hours a day. I’m not exactly sure how many hours is a few, it might not be enough time. Even at just a few it would be better than looking at a computer screen or talking on the phone. I know that without any human contact I would go crazy, so cyber world is out of the question. Not to mention all of those hours looking at a computer screen! I try to stay off of my computer as much as possible. It has always been hard for me to understand everyone who can search the web all day. Also, for all of the people that play video games all day, is another concept that I cannot wrap my head around. I can’t understand how all of those people who are so screen oriented can sit still all day! I feel that talking through your computer would be the same way. Not to mention if you only saw each other over the screen you would not be making new memories to help strengthen the relationship. If you do not have the opportunity to ever see each other face to face then what do you have other than someone in a box looking at you from the same perspective.
ReplyDeleteI am the same Kelly. Computers or ipads or tv screens are not my thing and I am baffled at those who are addiced to video games and the internet. I actually feel dumb after Ive done online research for any length of time. But put me in a library and I walk out tall feeling great. Its also a proven fact that looking at these type of screens can cause depression and insomnia among other things. My family and I are hoping to relocate to a place where cell phones and cable/satelittle wont work. My kids might be made fun of because they dont play video games where they steal cars or murder people, but they'll be able to survive if $h!t hits the fan.
DeleteGuess I kinda brought the below reading blog into this reply too. Can you tell its a sensitive subject? lol
DeleteI would rather have the few hours of face to face interaction. I love my family and when I am not with them I feel very lonely and empty in a sense. On the few occasions that I have used technology to keep in touch with my family, it has only made me missed them more. Face to face interaction is just very real and personal. Communication through technology almost seems fake, that emotional and personal connection is not made; at least not for me. If someone is communicating through technology and is in need of a hug; its not possible. As of now I spend the majority of my time working or at school, so I am hardly home. The hours that I am free and love being home around family. I love the time that I do have with them and that I am able to hug my family. Therefore, I rather have a few hours of face to face communication than through technology.
ReplyDeleteHi Gabriela,
DeleteI feel the same way, when I talk to my loved ones through technology, it makes me miss them more. I love interacting with my family and sometimes technology is the only option, when I am super busy with school and work. However I agree that interacting with someone over technology is not as emotional or personal compared to face to face. That is why I prefer interacting with loved ones face to face, even if it is for just a few hours.
Well put Gabriela, I myself feel the same when I'm busy with school and clinical rotations for the nursing program. Because of the demanding hours needed for the nursing program, I spend less time at home and away from my loved ones. And when I am home, the feelings of interacting with them are even more mutual. Same goes with my closest friends away for school.
DeleteThe world I would prefer to inhabit would be talking to my loved ones face to face. Although, it would be for a few hours a day, having the opportunity to spend quality time face to face with my loved ones is very important. Currently, I feel like I have twenty-four hour access to my loved ones, because I can text them or call them whenever I am not busy with school or work. Unfortunately, sometimes I go a week without communicating with my parents because I get so caught up in school and work. When I do talk to them over the phone, it is nice but it is not as awesome compared to when I go over to their house and visit. When I see my parents and family face to face, everything just feels right, especially when I visit the place where I grew up and created so many memories with my family and friends. Hence, I don’t feel the same connection with others, when it is over texting or skype. I feel most connected to my loved ones when I have their presence. Also, I can’t ever imagine having a relationship with a significant other who I cannot spend face to face time with. I know some people do the whole long distance relationship thing but I know that is something I would definitely struggle with. My world requires face to face interaction with loved ones, even if it is for a few hours a day because at the end of the day, those few hours complete my day.
ReplyDeleteI absolutely love your last sentence, "My world requires face to face interaction with loved ones, even if it is for a few hours a day because at the of the day, those few hours complete my day." I can totally relate to that. I feel like a relationship with any of my family members or friends would not be satisfying if we did not spend time together face to face. As you mentioned, I also feel most connected to people when their presence is physically with me. I can't fully explain the feeling but face to face interaction with other human beings feels necessary to my life. I can't imagine living in the other world where we never spent any physical time with our loved ones!
DeleteHi Diana, I agree that creating memories having your family or friend face to face is so much better than a simple text.
DeleteThe big difference between face-to-face and technology is the connection made. It is necessary to have that face to face interaction in order to connect. You are correct, many people do try long distance relationships but not many. I believe the reason for the few amount of couples that can actually accomplish such a challenge , is that as human we need that face to face interaction, and feedback.
DeleteTechnology does have its positive aspects, but only when used for special situations, not all the time and have it be the only means of communication.
Out of those two worlds, I would definitely choose to communicate face to face with my family and friends. I believe that when you interact with an individual through technology such as computer, phone, or any other gadget the conversation is not as unique as it would be if it were face to face. When communicating face to face you can put your 5 senses to work and use them during the interaction to assist you on how the other individual is feeling. Thus helping you know when the conversation is an intimate, joking, or friendly. Also, interacting face to face help develop a better bond between the two individuals. Every time I talk to my friends or family face to face, I feel closer to them. Just like anything else technology has its pros and cons. One of its positive features is that it can help you communicate with family and friends who are hours of way, as well as helping with businesses, schooling, and work. I believe the problem occurs when an individual only communicates with a person through technology. Technology has made it where people interact less on a face to face bases. Technology has now even made marriages become more difficult because now their are individuals who use online dating to find their future lover. When before, to find your true lover you would need to go interact among people to find the special one. There are sometimes when technology would come in handy for instance when friends come over to talk, and your not in a talking mood, I would rather text or facetime in a situation like that. So in the end, technology does have its positives and negatives, it just depends on what the individual prefers.
ReplyDeleteLike you said, technology can be a good tool for communication but it can also be a problematic one. People do tend to say things over technology that they don't feel saying to someone in person. I will admit I have done that. But we forget when we result to telling them over technology, we aren't able to gain skills in managing uncomfortable situations.
DeleteHello Rich, I agree that sometimes we face situations that we rather communicate via technology so it won't be too overwhelming than doing it face to face. It may ease the tension or something.
ReplyDeleteI loved how you added the "five senses" to this. I didnt even think about it but it is so true. When my husband is out of town for awhile I find myself clinging to his pillow at night. When he gets home and I hug him I always comment on his smell. They say the olfactory sense is one of the strongest and can bring back happy memories and the realease of seritonin. :-) Thanks for bringing that bit of extra awesomeness to the topic.
ReplyDeleteOnline communication has the power to ruin a marriage. Isn't it funny when some couples go to the extent of prohibiting the use of social networks in a relationship? What are your thoughts on that?
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteI would prefer to inhabit a world with face-to-face communication, even if it's only for a few moments. Although we may possess the technology to communicate without physical presence, it is much more intimate and meaningful to speak, or greet, someone face-to-face. Although having 24 hour a day communication with loved ones without physical presence seems great, it does not compare! About three years ago I was a senior in high school. At the time I also began a relationship with someone who was in the United States Marine Corp and was stationed out in Okinawa, Japan. Although we did communicate via Skype, Facebook, postal service, and email on a daily basis, nothing compared to the feeling of seeing him when he came to visit on leave. Don't get me wrong, I didn't mind waking up at about 2 a.m. just to speak to him for a few minutes, but that 12 hour difference is a big time difference! I believe I also had classes in the mornings later on in the relationship so I can actually recall being pretty tired at times! Although he was halfway across the world, I was okay with how things were, we seemed to appreciate each call or message since he had work and I had school and work. He was actually granted leave without my knowledge and came to surprise me the day before I graduated high school. Seeing him in person was a feeling like no other. There was no time difference or distance in the way. Needless to say, my graduation was honestly one of the most memorable days in my life. After a month of being on leave he had to fly back to Japan but we continued communication "regularly" the way we were used to. After he completed his service, he was sent back into town and things were much more different. It was great being together physically but arguing and spending time was much more different! We actually had to talk and work issues out and couldn't just hang up. At times we might have said things we regretted and couldn't take back, unlike on emailing and messaging. What I was trying to show with my example was that although technology is a great method of communication, it doesn't not compare to actually seeing someone in the flesh.
ReplyDeleteFace to face interaction is the best method of interaction. Seeing each other emotions, facial expression, and body expression makes a difference. But when you can't have face to face interaction like you said, skype, texting, phone calls work well as a second option. I had a friend that was dating a marine and had those late night skype calls. Its better than no interaction! I hope you guys are working on those issues, I can't imagine how hard it must be since you two went so long with long distance interaction.
DeleteThanks Cheyenne! Yeah it does make a difference! Our sleep scheduling was the worst. Thankfully while I was away I had a couple friends experiencing the same thing. I guess we had a thing for men in the military! lol
DeleteI am a big family person. I might not see my whole family every day, but for the most part I do see my intermediate family daily. My dad, stepmom, and 7 siblings only live two houses down from my fiancé and I. My mom and 2 sisters live less than a mile away from my house. When I go one day without seeing them, or go on vacation without them I feel like we have so much to catch up on. Plus I miss them like crazy. Although technology is great in order to have 24 access to love ones, I would chose a world where I could have a couple face to face hours with my loved ones daily. I believe face to face interactions are much more meaningful and I don’t think I could give these visits up. Technology makes it possible for my fiancé to face time me when he is out of town working and while I enjoy these calls and being able to see him; there is not much of a connection and I still feel lonely when the call is over. I could not imagine never getting to hug my family family hello or goodbye. However it would be great to have unlimited 24 hour access to family it is not as personal as those few face to face hours. I would cherish the few hours daily I got to spend with them.
ReplyDeleteI totally agree with you Jordan. Like you mentioned face to face interactions are more meaningful. It’s good to know that technological communication is helping you as well to communicate with your loved ones. Also, congratulations on getting engaged! Best of luck Jordan!
DeleteIf I had to choose one scenario over the other, I would choose face to face interaction for a couple hours a day. There is just no comparison when it comes to loved ones. I would love if this could happen, especially since most of my family lives in San Diego. I hardly seem them. If I had face to face interaction every day, it would just make my life. There's nothing like seeing their expressions, body language, seeing them laugh in person, and hugging them. If I couldn't have that face to face interaction, then I would like the 24 hours a day access over technology. At least even when you are busy, you can send someone a text or message letting them know your thinking of them even during your busy day. Face to face interactions are very different than over technology. There are sad cases of people who prefer only social networking and not face to face interaction. They have problems with face to face interaction and have phobias of face to face interaction. Another problem with social networking and communication over technology is people hide behind it when they are uncomfortable with saying something they rather not to someone.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you Cheyenne. Good job on providing the examples on how much expressions matter in communication. It’s true that face to face is the best form of communication, and no other communication compares to it. I believe face to face communication promotes self-confidence and an overall positive attitude.
DeleteI would prefer to communicate with my loved ones face to face. I believe that you can better understand the other person when they are right in front of you, as opposed to listening to them on the phone or talking to them on Skype. I think that a person has better chances of fully understanding the other person from the way they express their feelings and the way they talk. Communicating using technology always has it’s technical issues as well. There are times when Skype gives a distorted picture of the person to whom you are speaking to. Talking on the phone just lets you hear the other person, but it still doesn’t compare with actually looking at the person and hearing what they say. Texting is a good way of communicating, but at times a person wants to express a thought more vividly, and that is a bit time consuming through writing as opposed to speaking face to face to a person. Another benefit of communicating face to face is that it is the fastest method in comparison to all other methods.
ReplyDeleteI believe that face to face communication in the long run is better at teaching people good social skills. For example a person who gives a presentation in front of the class will learn to vocalize, socialize, and overall provide better detail and answering on a subject. A person who does the same presentation, but over the phone, will not see his or her audience and will be limited to expressing his or her with physical emphasis.
I definitely agree with the points you made about skype. Despite the ability to see the other person, it cannot compare to talking to someone face to face. Communicating in person gives us a better chance at fully understanding what the other person is saying and feeling because sometimes the two do not coincide.
DeleteI personally would prefer to inhabit the world in which you could only see your loved ones for a few hours but the interaction was face to face. It is true that the internet and the phone provide a means to communicate but in no way does it come close to face to face interactions. I feel that I am a very hands on person so a simple skype conversation would not suffice for me. I need contact, I need to be able to embrace someone and have them right in front of me. A text message or phone call can not caputre the real essence of the person. Yes you can read their thoughts but you can not see their expression or the tone the use when speaking. Even if the interaction would be brief I feel that having my loved ones face to face would make it worth it.
ReplyDeleteAlthough I am grateful for the technological advances in social media and networking, I would prefer the face-to-face interaction between my loved one. There are some things that technology cannot really fulfill in a relationship between humans. When I'm interacting with someone in person, especially with my loved ones, I refrain myself from using my phone checking facebook or youtube, because I want to enjoy the casual or personal conversations and cherish them. More and more I see families spending less time interacting with their loved ones and instead they are on their phones playing games, on facebook or instagram. I feel like this takes away quality time with loved ones or close friends and the bond between them aren't as strong as some who cherish each moment to the fullest. Like I said, technology has a limiting factor to the social interaction between humans when it comes to person-to-person.
ReplyDeleteI agree with what you said Frank, especially about living each moment to the fullest.
DeleteI would definitely prefer to inhabit a world with face to face communication. I feel it is important, and that there is no substitute for physical interaction. even if the physical contact were only for a short amount of time each day. when I think of this question, the first thing that comes to mind are my children. I don't think I could go one day without seeing them face to face.
ReplyDeleteI agree that there is no substitution for physical interaction. Face to face communication is definitely important in many ways like in your relationship with your children. I completely understand your reasoning for choosing to live in the world where you get face to face time with your loved ones for short amounts of time.
DeleteI think both worlds have their pros and cons for me. I don’t talk to or see my loved ones often due to two reasons: schedules, dislike for that person. I don’t think I could choose between the two worlds because I wouldn’t want to talk face to face with all of my loved ones but I wouldn’t want to only be able to communicate with the people that I like talking to through technology either.
ReplyDeleteRelationships are different when they are face to face than when they’re technological because you can see the person’s emotions, hear their tone of voice, and read their body language. Although we have Skype, where we are able to see the other person while we talk, this doesn’t compare to talking in person where you can feel the vibes/mood of the situation and see what’s going on in the situation. Using technology to communicate is more efficient at times but also leaves a lot for interpretation which can lead to misconstruing of the situation. New technology helps us communicate more quickly and efficiently but makes our conversations impersonal and the meanings behind our words easy to misinterpret.